Saturday, May 21, 2011

Chief Complaint of the Night

Young lady presents with cute, chubby baby playing with her stuffed toy in no distress.
Hood Nurse: Hi! What an adorable baby! What's going on tonight, guys?
Baby's Mama: Uh, hey. Yeah, so I brought my baby in here basically cause I just don't know what's wrong with her. She just keeps whining. I don't know why. Maybe she's just bratty. I don't know what her problem is.
Hood Nurse: Okay. Well. I mean, how long has this been going on? Has she been running fever? Pulling at her ears? Eating less?
Baby Mama:No. None of that. She's just whiny. She's been whiny for two weeks now. I'm getting really tired of it. Do you think you guys can figure out why she's whiny?
Hood Nurse: Uh. Maybe. I really don't know.
Baby Mama: Do you guys see a lot of stuff like this?
Hood Nurse: No. Not really.
Baby Mama: Oh. Well, I guess I just pay more attention than most parents.


  1. I've said it before, I'll say it again: How come we need to get a license to drive, but we can just procreate whenever we like and own these children without having to educate ourselves or insure a damn thing?

    My gosh that poor baby.

  2. Oh yes...she just pays more attention than most parents. Thats it. She should get an award that says "dumbest fucking parent of the night"

    ER Doc

    Oh and by the way you word verification was "tainght" hahaha

  3. You should have took out her uterus, ovaries and fallopian tubes at the triage desk. Clearly too stupid to procreate

  4. Haha blogger is trying to subliminally tell me to do more taint posts.

  5. Stupid/vapid people should NOT be allowed to breed. I'm babyless, not for lack of trying, & Mr Fuzzy & I would've been able to give kids a good life in a stable home with bonuses of good schools & assorted bene's like musical instruments & lessons, cater to their athletic interests or dance lessons, etc., yet I see way too many jackasses, mostly single jackasses, who have kids & don't know diddly-doodah about their needs, wants & behaviors. Cara in CA has a valid point, but even more valid is that in most places in the good ol' USA, you gotta' have a license, home checks & refs from your vet to adopt a pet, yet any ol' fool with a uterus can bare a child (or children) with no job, no insurance, no home of their own (we tax paying fools pay to get them an apt. tho')& they don't even really want said baby, nor treat them well once they're born. I hope the d/c papers read to "run, don't walk, to your OB/GYN & demand a tubal ligation ASAP!" (our tax $s will pay for that too, yet so few choose it...)