Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Screw You ALL

Ughhhh. I feel like I need a week off and about a gallon of gin after just about every triage shift I work. I get stuck up there without fail, the most awful night of the week, every week, and by the end of it my attitude towards everything is absolutely horrible and I am a horrendous bitch and I hate myself for it. I get so disgusted with humanity and then myself that I just want to become a crazy hermit and never talk to anyone ever again. But even more so today, like the douchebaggery of tonight really took the cake.
It was a team effort. And I have to commend the creativity, because people did some amazing shit that I've never seen before. I mean, yeah, coming in with your parents when you're a grown ass adult is old hat- obviously you're not a productive human being so you probably still live with them anyway- but I think tonight marks the record for the amount of times I've seen a man swear at other women in front of his own mother. Even more notably, it's also the first time I've seen a grown ass man throw himself on the floor, dry heave, push his mothers hand with the emesis bag away so he could vomit on the floor of the triage booth, proceed to roll around in said vomit, and then demand his elderly mother pick his 200 pound ass up and place him back in the wheelchair because he "didn't feel like getting up." WTF. Also, the first time I have said to anyone anything like, "Okay, fine. Well, we're trying to get you back and get you seen, but if you don't feel like getting up you can just lay here on the floor and I'll leave and triage people in the next booth. Neither me or your mother is big enough to pick you up, so that isn't happening. The pain and nausea medicine is back there. Get up when you decide you want it." (floor to wheelchair time- 2 seconds). Also, before you feel bad, may I also point out that the culprit in all this drama was that someone's tum-tum hurt x 3 hours after eating some bad sausage and biscuits. Awww.

Also, people trying to weasel out of the complicated process of writing down their name, birthday, and chief complaint all the time, but doing so because you have a sore throat, then faking a syncopal episode, THEN being well enough to scream at me when I try to get you to finish your check in form in a wheelchair that I need to do it- YUP. Okay, it looks like your throat is feeling better now, so have a seat in the waiting room.

Oh, also, in case you were wondering, taking back a white lady with diaphoresis and chest pain before someone of another race with hemorrhoids means you're a racist. DUH.

So yes, I know we're short staffed and stuff and I should pick up extra, but I don't really think I'll be helpful when my state of mind is one of PUNCH EVERYTHING.

13 comments:

  1. I like your blog, but I must say, that background really freaks me out.

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  2. Yup. Post after post, reconfirmation. You MUST work in my ER.

    I'm not sure if it's a relief for me or a worry for humanity that this is the norm at ERs around the country...

    ~ER RN, Small Town, Alaska

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  3. Hood Nurse.... take a holiday. Just a little one, even 3 days in a row. Leave town, hide on the couch watching DVDs, turn off the cell, do something to have a break. Cut yourself some slack, eat a chocolate cake, do something. I love reading your blog, I know you (normally) love nursing and I would hate to see "I quit" as the title of your next post. If for no other reason than I would be forced to find another nursing blog to read. And good blogs are few and far between.

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    1. Thanks. And agreed. My typical pattern is work my ass off and then, when I can't stand it anymore, take a 2-3 week vacation to make myself miss it again. I can feel myself getting there. Unfortunately thanks to horrendous staffing I probably won't be able to be gone that long, but I'm really trying to enjoy the time I have off by not thinking about work at all.

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  4. Well, we're trying to get you back and get you seen, but if you don't feel like getting up you can just lay here on the floor and I'll leave and triage people in the next booth.

    Love it.

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  5. Thanks for putting up with the bullshit. Reading your blog, and Nurse I'd make me appreciate the nurses and doctors so much more. I was taken yo the ER on March 2 in septic shock (3 weeks caring for each kid as they got strep throat is not a good situation when your taking double doses of Enbrel and Methotrexate for fight a stubborn RA flare, I was a sitting duck). They saved my life. So when you have yo put up with the bullshit, know that someone out there needs you to be there. Thanks for all you do.

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    1. stupid autocorrect! That would be Nurse K's blog and I don't know why it changed you and to into "yo". Sorry

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  6. I absolutely love your blog, and read it constantly. You are so funny, but your job sounds horrible. Why do you keep doing it, with all the verbal and physical abuse, and idiot management, and stupid ass patients (Not all are, I know). I am a hospice nurse, and while most of my patients die fairly soon, they are mostly polite and grateful, follow my suggestions, feel better, and write nice things in their obituaries. There are hundreds of nursing jobs. I would miss you, though!

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  7. Well, Mr. Hemorrhoids just wanted to be a pain in everyone's ass now...

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  8. If I could send you a lowball gin glass as a gift, it would be etched with BAMF on the side. You deserve it.

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  9. I love hearing your stories! They keep me sane! I think the best stories come from triage b/c you hear it all. Do you think there are triage nurses who just accept it all and don't get annoyed by stupid complaints? I can't stand over-compassionate people who find a far-out excuse for everyone's bad behavior and bad decisions, but I'm sure there are a few in hospitals.

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  10. YESSS! I love this. I love everything you write because I find myself shaking my head in agreement and commiseration. I learned to stop picking up extra shifts because I found the money simply wasn't enough reward for the mounting abuse.

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  11. Gahhh the racist stuff is SO annoying. We get that all the time at my ER too..."That doctor hasn't seen me yet because he RACIST! This is bullshit! Y'all too good to take care of black people?!". Bitch, shut the hell up. I'm sorry the doctor is treating people in respiratory failure/having heart attacks/in danger of imminent death or permanent bodily injury before treating you and your canker sore. Nothing pisses me off more than that shiz!

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