Saturday, September 8, 2012

New Item on My Last Day To-Do List, Courtesey of Emesis Bag Nurse

World Famous Emesis Bag Nurse: Yeah, I've been looking into going into the trophy store and buying a whole box of those acting statues with the little gold man on them so I can just hand them out to people in triage after they roll all over the floor and shit.  It's getting ridiculous up there. 
Gawwwdd that would be amazing.  I've been daydreaming what the reaction might actually be for days now. I'm thinking in order of likelihood, it would be angry yelling, total confusion, or slinking back into the waiting room in a defeated manner.  Either way it would be the most hilarious shit ever, and when I finally become a dusty old nurse who is about to retire, I'm doing it.  It's happening. I wonder how much they cost.  

Oh, and in other slightly related trophy news, I'm seriously considering hot-gluing a troll doll to a piece of plywood and spray painting it gold, thus creating the golden troll award (trademark pending).  This honor would obviously be granted at the end of the shift to the nurse who took care of the most abusive/terrible patient. I think it would boost morale, but probably also land me in the office. But still. Worth it?

13 comments:

  1. Gold leafing is cheap and easy. Looks shinier, too! :)

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  2. i would consider buying a sheet of gold star stickers rather than trophies-- more cost effective.

    but the troll award- is it a rotating trophy? doing it once per week would be good, and then the current winner gets to give it to the next winner. double points if you give it in front of the patient :-)

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  3. I like Liz's idea of the rotating Golden Troll Award, and CrayonEater's idea of gold-leafing a troll doll for more shine. No plaque, just the doll - so it's small enough to carry around in your pocket as a daily reminder of why you're there [LOL]. Awesome ideas, all. YES, DO IT!!

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  4. I think the golden troll award is a GREAT idea! Definitely do it!!!

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  5. WWQSD? (What Would Quint Studer Do?)

    I vote YES for sure. The Winner for the shift gets to have it hang out with them for their next shift and bestow the troll onto the next winner.

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  6. You are a genius. God knows we could use some humor in our ER...the troll award would go to the nurse who dealt with the shit covered drunk who proceeded to throw his shit at the staff last week.

    One of the conditions of the acting award would be having to come back and see stuff like the above, then be deposited back in the waiting room to wait for at least two hours.

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  7. Golden troll! Genius.

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  8. DO IT. i'm debating whether making tshirts with the phrase 'we know the truth' on the front and bullet decals on the back is worth the trip to the office. i'm thinking yes for that one, too.

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  9. I think the troll is absolutely fabulous. As long as it doesn't contain the patients name or why I can't see why "the man" would have a problem with it. Great morale booster.

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  10. LOVE IT! Totally Worth an visits to the principals office.... Although I am sure they will snicker at it as well.

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