World Famous Emesis Bag Nurse: Yeah, I've been looking into going into the trophy store and buying a whole box of those acting statues with the little gold man on them so I can just hand them out to people in triage after they roll all over the floor and shit. It's getting ridiculous up there.
Gawwwdd that would be amazing. I've been daydreaming what the reaction might actually be for days now. I'm thinking in order of likelihood, it would be angry yelling, total confusion, or slinking back into the waiting room in a defeated manner. Either way it would be the most hilarious shit ever, and when I finally become a dusty old nurse who is about to retire, I'm doing it. It's happening. I wonder how much they cost.
Oh, and in other slightly related trophy news, I'm seriously considering hot-gluing a troll doll to a piece of plywood and spray painting it gold, thus creating the golden troll award (trademark pending). This honor would obviously be granted at the end of the shift to the nurse who took care of the most abusive/terrible patient. I think it would boost morale, but probably also land me in the office. But still. Worth it?