Friday, June 7, 2013

I Love it Here, Because Something Is Wrong With Me

I've been rather ambivalent about my job for the last few months, wistfully dreaming about going to a fancy, slow ER, or oncology or hospice or bar tending, grateful for my occasional nice, normal patient but pretty much completely and totally over all this other bullshit.  I shared my "I'm not quite sure how much longer I'd really like to be doing this" sentiments with one of my medic friends at work, who promptly blew me off.  I was a little bit butt-hurt about it, to be quite honest.
"You'll never quit.  You love the madness too much.  You'd miss it."
"Nope.  I really don't.  I'm tired of this crap.  I'm just done."
"Nope.  You'll never quit.  Secretly you love it."
I walked away further convinced that no one really gets me here and I could walk away any time and miss absolutely nothing about this place except....ugh.  He's totally right.
You guys, I am a twisted individual.  Obviously I became a nurse to help people and touch lives and make the world a better place, but I also sort of became an ER nurse to see the hilarious shit show circus that unfolds before me every night.   Nights like tonight where it really goes above and beyond the everyday ridiculousness really reinforce that fact that, yep, secretly I love this crap.
There are few things funnier than listening to the things someone yells at the hospital police while high on PCP.  It is ten times as funny when two patients high on PCP, both restrained and in rooms next to one another, start tag teaming it and yelling at one another and the cops. Especially when one of them spends the night telling anyone who will listen that he is a werewolf while growling to drive the point home while the other falls asleep, snoring heavily and occasionally ripping massive farts that ring throughout the entire unit.
It's funny as hell when the two chronic drunks that come in via EMS for cc: found passed out somewhere in public serendipitously find themselves next to each other in the hall beds.  It's even funnier when they become best friends and creepily hit on every woman within eyesight together.
Even the WTF moments are hilarious, like when my (non-critical) stabbing victim reveals to me that the  argument that preceded his injury was him yelling at his girlfriend about how she would have a home-cooked meal on the table if she "wanted to keep her a man" or when I find my patient on BIPAP trying to sneak Raisinetes through her mask.
This place is ridiculous, and it's an ass-kicking.  I held my bladder for 8 hours tonight before I remembered to pee, and I went nearly 12 without eating. But in it's own weird way, it was really fun.  As much as it would be fulfilling to work somewhere else, I would really miss how hilarious this place is.  It's like my own personal trashy reality TV show that I get paid to watch for 12 hours a day.  I'm sure I'd actually be really bummed if it got cancelled.

20 comments:

  1. just lurked over here.... love it.
    coming from 36 years nursing.. still doing the 12 hour shift.. but now in boutique ER!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. If I went to a cushy nursing job, I wouldn't have anything to bitch about. And that wouldn't be any fun at all.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I don't secretly love that $h1t, I openly love that $h1t! We could be twisted sisters! Please keep writing and tweeting. I <3 your stories.

    ReplyDelete
  4. couldn't have said it better myself. i'm pretty sure that no other job comes with as much free entertainment...

    ReplyDelete
  5. As someone who left for greener pastures, I am now trying to jump back over the fence. It take a certain kind of f***** up to enjoy it, but it feels like "home"

    ReplyDelete
  6. I always know that I am going to survive the current crisis when I realize I hate being in the hospital.

    ReplyDelete
  7. maybe I secretly love the freak show too....OMG

    ReplyDelete
  8. Yeah, I left for greener pastures, and came crawling back, guess I'm a trauma drama junkie too. Which is probably like PCP as it sometimes makes me talk to myself....

    ReplyDelete
  9. As a burn RN, I definitely get your love of the absurd.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Your blog alone is why I am choosing the ER as one of my 2 choices for my final rotation in nursing school.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I think the ED is like a drug- so addicting, but not necessarily good for us. There's also the pride factor because everyone knows that ED nurses are the sh*t. When people ask me, "What kind of nurse are you?", for me to say anything else wouldn't feel as awesome. Just sayin'

    ReplyDelete
  12. Annnnnnd...this is exactly why I find myself wanting to do emergency medicine as a PA. You may be crazy, but you're not alone. I mean, we nutty types do have the most fun don't we?

    ReplyDelete
  13. Great Blog. From a former RN I totally get this. We are cut from the same mold. I look forward to future medical related blog posts

    ReplyDelete
  14. My sister-in-law works in the ER she tells me the same crazy stories and how she wanted to leave but cant help to stay for all the drama.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Plus, where else do you get the "I.. sat... yeah... sat on "?

    ReplyDelete
  16. SerenityNowHospitalJune 26, 2013 at 10:29 PM

    I will be filling in a shift and making a guest appearance july 5th late swing shift. hope to see you there.

    ER Doc

    ReplyDelete
  17. Omg. Hi er Doc. I have been stalking the comments section on my blog roll trying to find out how to get back into SerenityNow! I loved it, read all the OLD posts, never commented. I understand need for privacy, but I don't know anything! I just want to read the awesome stuff you guys do! You and Crass Pollination are all locked up!! Sorry, hood nurse! I am hijacking your comment section! Please oh please say it aint so!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SerenityNowHospitalJuly 4, 2013 at 7:37 AM

      Thanks Karen. Due to it being kind of dangerous for docs to blog now a days (at least the stuff I like to blog about) and being lazy, we took the blog down. Sorry.

      Delete
  18. I really love your blog and I am writing a blog myself about the life of a student nurse check it out :)

    ReplyDelete
  19. Very entertaining blog. Love that you tell it like it is!

    ReplyDelete